Erik Frederickson - Life Coach and Recovery Coach
Restoring Relationships in Recovery
Updated: Sep 1, 2022
From Jessica Sanders, Recovery Advocate and Blogger
Today I am sitting at my Aunt and Uncle's house all alone, just to rest and relax, while they are gone for the day. Maybe that doesn't seem like such a big deal, but to me it's huge.
Just six years ago I was strung out on meth wreaking havoc and destroying my life. Out of the kindness of their heart, this same aunt and uncle let me move into this very house. I then proceeded to use drugs, disrespect, disregard, and lie to them. They tried to confront the issues and set boundaries but I was blinded by the drive of addiction and soon they had no other choice but to ask me to leave.
No one could blame them but of course, I was very angry. They wanted to see me succeed in life and break free from all my destructive habits. I was always invited into their house during holidays and welcomed to family functions but I was never left alone there. They loved me very much and they quickly forgave me. However, I refused to accept that love or advice.
My heart was hard and I wasn't allowing anyone to speak into my life.
Check out this 2 min clip where Jessica shares about the moment when God set her free from her 15 yrs of addiction.
You can listen to her full story HERE on the Recovering Reality Podcast.
Once I got clean my family was my biggest support. God softened my hard heart and I became teachable. Those important family relationships have been reconciled and deep connections have been made. It took time to rebuild trust but with honesty and integrity those bonds were made.
I accepted responsibility for myself, and I walked out of my recovery. I made amends to those I had wronged. I gave them space and I let my life be the testimony of change. I never tried to convince anyone of anything. I also never tried to force relationships on anyone who wasn't ready. God loves to restore broken people and broken relationships. So I did my part and let God do
Each relationship that had been destroyed with my parents, siblings, aunts, uncles and so many others was being repaired and restored. Some quickly, some slowly, but each one was deeper and more meaningful than ever before.
Even though it wasn't easy to walk out of the restoration process in each relationship the results were priceless. It's a very humbling experience to have to accept responsibility for your wrongs and let others express their feelings. It is a process that is rushed or done overnight. So don't give up hope even if you feel like things will never change.
Pray to God and ask Him to soften the hearts of the people who you hurt. Ask Him to show you where you went wrong in those relationships and ask God to forgive you. Then give it time to work out.
Nothing worthwhile comes easy but when you partner with God it's all possible.
How to Repair Relationships after Addiction - Narconon.com
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