Search
  • Erik Frederickson - Life Coach and Recovery Coach

For years I couldn't figure out how to live free from a drug, alcohol, and pornography addiction.


I hated it, but it was my "go to" when it came to numbing the unaddressed pain and forgetting about the mess that my life had become.


One of the biggest things that provoked me to face my demons was I knew that I would never live out my real potential while trying to manage my addictions.


Here are some questions to ask yourself that can start a different internal conversation.



1- Do you think you will be able to live out your true potential with your current addiction?


2- When you're 80 how do you want people to remember you and the life you lived?


3- How much money are you spending on the slow ruin of your life on a monthly basis?


4- How could you better be spending that money?


5- Are you mentally and emotionally available for your loved ones while in active addiction?



I began to think about these things as my addictions ate away at me like slow motion suicide.


I understand as much as anyone that it's not the easiest thing in the world to quit, but life is waiting for you. God is for you and wants to help, and he wants to help you have a real and satisfying life! A life with real relationships, peace, fulfillment, and the ability to be present and pursue your dreams.


You can recover!


If you or a loved one are having trouble getting or staying clean and sober, let's talk. We coach people from all over the world into healthy and sustainable recovery from drugs, alcohol, and pornography addictions. Recovery is worth it, and WE DO RECOVER!

Sign up for 7 days of FREE online Recovery coaching HERE

Contact us for Recovery Coaching or Speaking info@recoveringreality.com




  • Erik Frederickson - Life Coach and Recovery Coach

Consciousness approached like a terrifying nightmare waiting to begin. Before I embarked on the dreadful task of opening my eyes I first needed to make it past the sound of my heartbeat pulsating through every blood cell in my brain.


My next task was figuring out how to present myself to the world. It was a process, and I had to start somewhere. My eyes slowly came apart like a dungeon door being pried open. It took more effort then I had just to unglue my eyelids from each other.


As difficult as it had been up to this point, now I had to navigate the presence of light piercing my eyeballs like daggers through flesh.


Waking up after a night of blackout drinking with a hangover that feels like you are flirting with death, is a lonely place. Darkness seemed so much more comfortable than that piercing light, light meant exposure.


As the light punctured my eyeballs and instantly dilated my pupils, my mind was intimidated by the fact that night had passed and day had birthed.


My head tried to process what was happening as I tried to figure out where I was, but the word "headache" didn’t even begin to describe the pain my head was experiencing. Explosive pain radiated down my neck and my body felt like cement was drying in my veins.


The pain and the sickly sluggishness were more then one could fathom enduring. I tried to talk, but my saliva was like dried Elmer’s glue coating the inside of my mouth.


As discomforts of drastic proportions manifested all over my body, I began to feel pain in my right hand. I tried to move my fingers but it was like trying to unthaw tree branches in sub-zero temperature. The slightest movement of my fingers and hand sent wreathing pain up my arm.


It was then that my brain tried to rouse my memory into retracing my steps because I had no clue what I had done the night before and why I was waking up in a cold and lonely jail cell.


An officer eventually made it to the door and explained that I had been arrested while driving under the influence the night prior. It jogged my memory and the last retrievable thought was a vague recollection of being pulled from my car at a gas station.


Then punching the jail cell door...



I never would have thought that the “fun” of teenage drinking would have pulled me to the pits of hell on earth. Addiction is a venomous beast with death as its goal, and it starts slow.


It starts with a smile and a joy, albeit a counterfeit one, quickly followed by a sucker punch to the soul.


Every so often it's important for me to recall one of those hellish nights, there were many during my 13 years of active addiction. I don't take that trip down memory lane to drag myself through the mud and remember what a rotten person I am, but to provoke gratitude.


Sitting where I am today and thinking about all that God has done in my life during my 11 yrs of recovery motivates me to stay diligent on the path of freedom. Those memories provoke me to help more people, and to remain grateful that God has rescued me from hell itself.


If you're still stuck in the spin cycle of addiction, there is hope. You can recover, and God wants to see your life transformed even more than you do. Have you had enough? We would love to talk and get you the help you need.


Check out this short story for 5 mins of HOPE



If you or a loved one are having trouble getting or staying clean and sober, let's talk. We coach people from all over the world into healthy and sustainable recovery from drugs, alcohol, and pornography addictions. Recovery is worth it, and WE DO RECOVER!

Sign up for 7 days of FREE online Recovery coaching HERE

Contact us for Recovery Coaching or Speaking info@recoveringreality.com


  • Erik Frederickson - Life Coach and Recovery Coach

Updated: Jul 8

Have you ever found old food that has been left out somewhere in a dark place in your house or garage? Even the thought of it makes me say, "yuck."


The smell alone is atrocious. The mold growing on it has mold growing on it, and this dark germ infested Petri dish serves as a magnet for insects and rodents.


What if this picture of old moldy food in the natural realm is eerily similar to what is happening in the spiritual realm when someone is trapped in a porn addiction?


Let's set that possibility a side for just a moment, and first look at some sobering stats on America's issues with porn.

  • Over 40 million Americans are regular visitors to porn sites

  • The porn industry’s annual revenue is more than the NFL, NBA, and MLB combined. It is also more than the combined revenues of ABC, CBS, and NBC.

  • 47% of families in the United States reported that pornography is a problem in their home

  • Pornography use increases the marital infidelity rate by more than 300%

  • 56% of American divorces involve one party having an “obsessive interest” in pornographic websites

  • 55% of married men and 25% of married women say they watch porn at least once a month -www.conquerseries.com


Now let's take a quick look at some of the physical issues that addiction to porn creates.


A porn addiction sets the mind into the addiction cycle.


"Studies show that actual brain function changes in someone who has an addiction - and the changes are the same in all addiction: alcohol, drugs, or pornography. Because pornography use can become an actual addiction, viewers are not able to stop through their own will power. Pornography addicts will need to engage in the same difficult recovery process a drug addict has to go through." -familytoday.com


In the same way that a tolerance to drugs and alcohol builds over time, so does an addiction to pornography.


Warning signs of a Porn addiction include, "Requiring increasing amounts or more explicit porn to gain the same satisfaction or thrill, similar to the development of a tolerance" -Projectknow.com


Drastically confuses what love, and real intimacy is.


"With pornography, we use sex as a substitute for nurture, intimacy, and love. Sex is no longer a wonderful source of connection between our deepest selves and a beloved partner; it becomes a commodity used to avoid intimacy and mask needs that should be met through human connections." -familytoday.com


Porn Addiction ruins your Libido.


"It’s only natural, then, that many people who use porn in the past, or who use porn in the present, have virtually no libido when it comes to making love to their spouse. The spouse is not what turns them on, and so the natural drive that we have for sex is transferred somewhere else." -tolovehonorandvacuum.com


This list could go on, but let's get back to the analogy of moldy food left in a dark place.


In multiple Gospel accounts Jesus was accused of being demon possessed. Part of the accusation was Jesus was partnered with Beelzebub. What? Who is Beelzebub?


Beelzebub is a word used in the Hebrew translated old testament, and the Greek translated new testament. The title is a name for Satan himself and can be translated as, Lord of the Flies.


What's the point? What does this have to do with a porn addiction?


What attracts flies?


These pests are common in unkept areas. Conditions that attract flies in and around homes include:

  • Garbage cans left uncovered.

  • Animal carcasses in the walls, attics, or elsewhere.

  • Manure or pet feces around yards.

  • Fermenting fruit on countertops.

  • Spilled soda and open containers of alcohol.

  • Scum at the bottom and coating the inside of drains. - Orkin.com


The reason a porn addiction has such terrible side effects is because we are openly feasting on old moldy infested food, spiritually speaking. When someone hides and subjects themselves to that spiritual reality, they open a door to be plagued by the Lord of Flies.


And the results of opening your spirit up to those flies, or demons, is destruction on personal lives and the personal lives of those around the person addicted to porn.


When hidden in the dark this spiritual sickness/addiction slowly eats away at us from the inside out and causes a ripple effect of damage to those around us.


The Good News in the midst of this?


There is a way out, and you can be free from this spiritual sickness. I was personally enslaved to an addiction to pornography for over 14 yrs, but roughly 10 yrs ago it ended. It ended when I had had enough, and I begin intentionally fighting it with accountability and prayer.


God wants to set those free that are locked into the spiritual chains of a pornography addiction, but they have to come out of hiding and walk in the Light.


If you or a loved one is struggling, let's talk. There is freedom, and it can start today.


If you or a loved one are having trouble getting or staying clean and sober, let's talk. We coach people from all over the world into healthy and sustainable recovery from drugs, alcohol, and pornography addictions. Recovery is worth it, and WE DO RECOVER!

Sign up for 7 days of FREE online Recovery coaching HERE


Contact us for Recovery Coaching or Speaking info@recoveringreality.com



BLOG

Website Designed by KambanMedia.com - 2020.

CONNECT WITH US

  • Facebook - Grey Circle
  • Instagram - Grey Circle
  • YouTube - Grey Circle

We're here for you when you're ready. 

Book Now.png